This period has been challenging for me.
My family and I were looking forward to celebrating Singapore’s 57th National Day when we could wear our country’s colors of red and white. However, the red turned more white when my beloved father passed away on the same day – 9th Aug 2022. He was 83.
On top of that, my flat/apartment is currently undergoing home improvement renovation works while my dear son is taking major school examinations at the same time.
After reflecting on what could have gone right or wrong, here are some of my thoughts:
(a) Treasure everyone
I’m glad I’d spent the last few weeks and months doing things for my parents. Despite my own health challenges, responsibilities at home, my work, and my family, whenever my parents needed some help, I would try my best to find time to do so. Now that my father is gone, I’m already missing his phone calls “pestering” me for this and that. How I wished I could hear his voice again even if it frustrates or irritates me.
(b) Focus on the present
I’ve conceded that being a multi-tasker doesn’t mean better. In fact, it’s often “humanly impossible”. For one thing, being a wife, mother, business owner, employee, daughter, sister, etc, it’s really impossible to focus on being good at everything and every role.
Further, no point in thinking about the past, and too deeply into the future. Thinking and worrying over things don’t bring about actions. I’ve learned that love really means “being there”, “doing something” and “spending time” with someone. These are all action words.
(c) Be nicer and kinder
It really doesn’t hurt to be nicer and kinder to someone else. Helping someone without expecting anything back, and doing it from the bottom of my heart, has made me a happier person. No regrets, no “what ifs” or “why didn’t I”. Living life with regrets, to me, is even worse than the regret itself.
(d) Home sweet home
How I’ve taken for granted a roof over my head, a nice comfy bed, and a clean spacious bathroom! I’m thankful to be staying in a hotel for the past few days during the renovation works in my flat/apartment. I can’t help but think about how challenging it is not to have a home to put all my things, a place I call my own to return to after a hard day’s work, and a haven where I can safely and joyfully spend quality time with my family and pets.
I’m sure the list could go on, however, you get the idea. Setbacks often set us up to rediscover and re-calibrate what really matters most in our lives. For now, I know for sure it’s the people around me, the place I call home, and just small acts of kindness to as many people as I best can.
Josephine PL Ong
